How Family Pressure Turned a Girl’s School Dream into a Child Marriage in Niger Community – Sani Abdullahi  

How Family Pressure Turned a Girl’s School Dream into a Child Marriage in Niger Community

At 15, Fatima Babaman believed her life was about to change for the better after gaining admission into Government Girls Secondary School, Bida. Instead, the same morning she celebrated her admission, she was told she would be married to her uncle’s son — a decision made without her consent.

In Kakapongi, a closely knit community in Niger State in northern Nigeria, the call to prayer drifts through the early morning air, losing its way as it travels through the mist. The crow of a cock breaks the silence, ushering in a new day and for Fatima, a future she believed was finally within reach.

She stepped out of her room, brimming with confidence. Her future looked promising. She had just gained admission into Government Girls Secondary School Bida at the age of 15.

She fantasize about a new chapter of her life — one that, like every other female child in her classroom, she looked forward to and had a right to. These dreams were protected by law, including the right to dignity, the right to education, and the right to be free from violence, as guaranteed under the Nigerian Constitution and the United Nations Convention on the Rights of the Child.

“I am now going to be a big girl, my journey to become a nurse has started,” she recalled later, her eyes lighting up as she spoke.

Mallam Isah Babaman was a petty trader in the local market, widely respected for his honesty and sound judgment. In the community, disputes often ended with a familiar statement: “Let us go to Mallam Isah.” His words carried weight and he commanded respect.

That morning, as he arranged his tables and set out his wares, Fatima stopped by his shop, smiling brightly. She knelt to greet her uncle, dropped her bucket, and helped him sweep the shop and its surroundings. As she was about to leave, Haliru, Mallam Isah’s second son walked in. He had recently completed his apprenticeship in vehicle repair.

She knelt again.

“Ina kwana, kawu,” she said softly.

He returned the greeting, and she went on her way.

Unknown to Fatima at the time, that encounter with Haliru at her uncle’s shop was going to trigger a new trajectory in her life. As Mallam Isah himself confirmed to this reporter, “Immediately my son came in, a thought came to my mind, and I decided for him to get married to Fatima, as she is such a respectful and good girl”.

“My son has to obey me, he can’t say otherwise, my father chose my first wife for me too, so it is normal for me to choose my child’s first wife too,” Mallam Isah said.

Fatima’s father, Malam Hassan Babaman, a farmer by trade, loves and adores his uncle. When his uncle came to him about getting their children married, he accepted immediately, without consulting either the mother nor the child as she is protected under section 21 of the Child Rights Act 2003.

“My uncle came to me for my daughter’s hand in marriage and I told him immediately that she is also his daughter and can do anything he wants,” he said.

Plans were put in motion. Haliru’s presence in Fatima’s compound increased, trying to get closer, but Fatima never paid much attention to that, as they all grew up together. She recalled, “I always looked at him as my big brother.” Little did she know that her fate had been decided.

Then came the day she believed would take her closer to her dreams.

Her mother, Mrs. Hauwa Babaman’s voice woke her early. “Fati, come quickly. Your father wants to see you.”

Joy filled her heart. Today is the day, she thought. Certain that her father wanted to wish her well before she left for school, she hurried to him, knelt, and greeted both parents.

Her father smiled and told her he had news.

Smiling, convinced her dreams were finally coming true, she listened as he began.

“You know my uncle, Mallam Isah,” he said, “and his son Haliru, who has just finished his apprenticeship.”

Then he said the words that would go on to shatter her world.

“You are going to marry him. He is a young, hardworking man, and I can vouch for him since he is my uncle’s son. He will take care of you.”

He stood up and walked away, leaving behind a deafening silence.

“She just stood there, staring,” her mother later recounted, saying she was confused as she had no prior knowledge of this.

The decision had already been made. There was no room for argument.

“She is his child,” the mother said quietly. “And there was nothing I could do but accept.”

Fatima said all her dreams had been shattered. Every plea to her father, even to allow her to finish secondary school, fell on deaf ears. She gave up hope immediately because there was nothing she could do; she had always been taught to obey her parents.

And that was how she got married to Haliru at 15 years of age.

Life After Marriage

Fatima, now 20, recalls a recurring reality that still haunts her. Although married to Haliru, her life was filled with fear and pain. Disagreements and harsh treatment from her husband often left her anxious and distressed. She lived in constant worry, never knowing when the next beating or verbal abuse would come.

Abuse

“One occasion, I was down with fever, my husband came to meet me at night but I denied him, I told him I was ill but he took offence, he said he has paid my bride price so he has to access me anytime he wants it, but when I insisted on no. He felt insulted and started beating me up,” she recounted, hitting her head on the wall in the process only to be revived by concerned neighbors.

When asked if he forces himself on her, she replied no, saying he only beats her when she refuses and leaves her there, with no food for the day.

“I told him I wanted to go out to market to make some money for myself but he refused and he doesn’t give me money, anytime I complain or go out without his knowledge I get beaten up too,” she said.

There was a time he beat her up so badly she was hospitalized afterwards, a fact confirmed by both her father and mother.

A neighbour, Mallam Ndagi, also confirmed hearing Haliru hurl abusive and insulting language at Fatima, and he also confirmed he has heard fighting going on in the house on several occasions.

Such conduct violates her right to dignity, guaranteed under Section 34 of Nigeria’s Constitution, and breaches the Child Rights Act, which protects children from violence, abuse, and forced marriage. It also contravenes the UN Convention on the Rights of the Child, which ensures children are free from all forms of physical or mental harm and have the right to live with respect and safety.

Fatima said Haliru often reminded her that their marriage was an “Auren Dangi” (marriage of relatives), and that she had been offered to him, giving him the power to treat her as he pleased.

Fatima Babaman’s experience is not an isolated case. With thousands of under reported cases going under the radar yearly despite constitutional guarantees and laws such as the Child Rights Act 2003, which explicitly prohibit child marriage and betrothal. Cultural norms, family pressure and weak enforcement of laws continue to strip young girls of their right to education, dignity and even freedom from violence.

National Human Rights Commission

After family members tried to intervene, agreements were made for the couple to “sheath their swords” and make the marriage work, but to no avail. Concerned community members eventually took the matter to the National Human Rights Commission, Niger State.

Upon receiving the complaint, all parties involved were invited, including this reporter, due to a strong interest in documenting stories like this so that the world could know their experience.

During the meeting, Haliru denied all allegations leveled against him, including child marriage and battery, insisting that Fatima had willingly accepted the marriage.

Subsequent conversations with Haliru revealed that he had also not wanted to marry the then young Fatima, but, like Fatima’s father, his own father had persuaded him to accept the marriage now that he had completed his apprenticeship and was entering manhood.

The state coordinator NHRC, Niger state, Dr Nuhu Mohammed Hassan said the issues now has to be looked at due to cultural point of this people and the need to tread with caution, so as not to escalate the situation further.

He emphasized how a whole lot of the young girl’s right as a human being has been violated, such as her right to dignity, personal liberty as well as private and family life.

He gave the family 1 month to try and see if the situation can still be salvaged.

Separation

The marriage ultimately dissolved, leaving Fatima to rebuild amid stigma and trauma.

Back in her father’s home, a place she now describes as her sanctuary, she grapples with the aftermath. Sudden shouts still make her jittery, sudden movements make her tense.

“Looking back at the whole scenario now, it seems like a failed project of my father,” she reflects with a mix of sorrow and clarity.

The separation brought whispers and stigma from the community, but her mother’s unwavering support has been a lifeline.

“Everything happens for a reason, and Allah knows best,” her mother reminds her, helping Fatima emerge from the shadows.

When asked if her father has apologized, Fatima’s response is a simple “No.” Yet, hope flickers. Dreams of returning to school are reforming in her mind, a testament to her resilience.

In a country where UNICEF estimates that 44% of girls are married before 18, Fatima’s story underscores the urgent need for enforcement of existing laws and cultural shifts to prioritise education and consent over tradition.

As the afternoon sun dips lower, Fatima looks toward the horizon. Her journey from child bride to survivor is far from over, but in her quiet strength lies a powerful message: shattered dreams can be pieced back together, one step at a time.